Millisecond Memories
by NinjaZeo10
Summary: As Roger suffers his identity crisis, Dorothy looks back at her own memories...


Disclaimer: I don't own Big O. Good thing too, or Angel might be in trouble.

Author's Note: This takes place as a sidestory to Act 14: Roger the Wanderer and contains spoilers for all the previous acts.

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Millisecond Memories

By NinjaZeo10  


  
  
Roger's eyes were glazed over. I wasn't sure why they were. He had not exacerbated his wound, I had made sure of that. The fight had been rough so far but nothing beyond what Roger normally endured. Between Big O and myself, the electricity flowing around Roger and me was nothing more than a few sparks and light.  
  
I gazed at his previously clenched jaw, now momentarily relaxed. His whole body had gone slack, peaceful.  
  
I should move the controls, take over the fight. Survival should take precedence after all.  
  
Should.  
  
Pride.  
  
Roger's pride. He'd never forgive me if I finish the fight for him. Well, he would. But I'm not sure I could do that to him. He cherishes his pride, but more importantly, his freedom. Including the freedom to fail.  
  
I'll wait. There's no need to hurt him...yet.  
  
I gaze over at his form again. The light playing around us causes interesting patterns to move across him. From this angle, his eyes seem to glow. His face cuts a distinct profile.  
  
Roger's always looked good. He knows it too. Sometimes I wonder if he dresses the way he does to downplay it.  
  
And then I remember how he acts around women. Young women. Young beautiful women.  
  
A millisecond. I have time. Time enough.  
  
I remember the first time I saw him. He'd already seen me. His words were gentle, reassuring. Until he realized I was an android. Puzzlement. Irritation. But not the anger I found the first time father took me outside. I don't know why I thought I could trust this man.  
  
Again, his confusion, when I asked him to protect me. I don't remember why I asked, but I knew that I should.  
  
Amusement. Why calling him a louse would bring a smile to his face I am still not sure. But...  
  
Pleased. When he found me again with father. I recognize that look now, the one he gets when he's solved a mystery or resolved a situation that's been annoying him. I suppose it's natural for negotiators.  
  
Concern? For me? I wasn't sure why he would be, but I was...grateful. Yes, I was, when he pulled me from my 'Big' sister.  
  
Roger is too easily swayed by women. Especially dangerous ones. Like her.  
  
Fear. Not of me, I understood. Some terrifying memory. I tried to offer some comfort. He still hasn't explained calling me 'mama' in the tunnels. But he repaid my meager efforts later. How he can be so protective of me and yet so disdainful the next moment…  
  
Frustration. A dedicated negotiator, he still sleeps too much. Roger would say I have a vengeful streak, if he would consider our relationship from my point of view. Simply because he doesn't like getting up in the morning. Even though Norman tells me he misses my playing if I don't.  
  
Trepidation. I find it...odd to be able to make the negotiator so nervous. Odd…but strangely pleasing. And he should have been nervous. Pero was a really good friend. I understand why Roger stopped me from following him. Still, if anyone else had tried to stop me...  
  
Something. Fear? Anger? Happiness? I have no clear memory when Beck inserted the control device and had me try to kill Roger. But I do remember Roger's eyes...and a feeling. I saw a familiar glimmer after I asked my second question later, but he never answered.  
  
Nervousness. Followed by irritation. It was not my birthday. But he gave me a gift. It is...an acceptable fit. Norman's help most likely. Though I suppose he could've...he liked my pirouette.  
  
Amused relief as he entered the cockpit, his arm bleeding. His heart was racing, though it seemed to calm as he sat in the chair, more when I took his arm. Ironic, considering my own circulation has increased. Though it's to increase the softness of my from to support Roger's...part of me wishes it was for something else.  
  
Two milliseconds.  
  
Roger's back. His fierce determination returns. His back tenses. I can feel his muscles moving underneath his shirt.  
  
As one, we move. The other megadeuses are forced back.  
  
Curious, he's opened the cockpit. Not wise, but neither is Roger.  
  
Fascinating. I don't believe Roger's ever used that before.  
  
Hollowness. He's standing up. Why? I start to move with him, but he grunts at me. I let him go, disappointed. He walks out.  
  
"My name is Roger Smith. In this city that's lost its memory, I am...a negotiator."  
  
I'm...surprised. A crisis of identity, now? No...then. I can see it in his eyes when he looks back at me, smirking. Wherever my Roger went, he's back now.  
  
He's back.  
  
My Roger.  
  
Mine.  
  
And I'm his. Even if he doesn't know it.  
  
And I'll be there for him.  
  
Now.  
  
And Forever.  
**   
*Fin***


End file.
